Photo: HolyHolySnappers

The words intimacy and relationship are two distinct terms with separate meanings. Nevertheless, they are closely linked together as intimacy is essential for a durable relationship. Intimacy is one of the main ingredients of a relationship that allows a couple to enjoy even more pleasure in exploring each other.

This closeness is like a feeling of familiarity, being highly personal and intimate, including all the things that display affection or a very close and warm friendship. A couple is intimate when they can share even the most private and important things of life with each other, truthfully and without any reticence. Being intimate with your partner means that you are capable of fully exploring and discovering each other.

Distance in a relationship is created if the couple fails to establish and maintain the needed closeness. That is why intimacy is a fundamental element of a relationship right from the beginning. Every person who is in a relationship should be aware of how to create it, as the closeness is responsible for strengthening the emotional bond between couples.

The creation of intimacy requires almost a constant awareness of your partner and of the relationship as well. At the same time you have to value your partner and especially the relationship. In most cases, communication is crucial for creating a sincere and candid environment, while the physical connection is required for the desired intimacy and familiarity.

The closeness in a relationship is a sign of constant attention for your partner, affection and warmth to let your partner know that he/she is considered to be very special. As the affection, warmth and love can also be expressed verbally, they are significant elements that greatly contribute to achieving intimacy and a close and healthy relationship.

As intimacy is all about closeness and being highly personal, it is a prerequisite for you and your partner to be truthful and upright with each other. Acting honestly and sincere all the time has a beneficial effect on the relationship. Even more, accepting your partner just the way he/she is will greatly encourage a mutual appreciation and deep affection.

To achieve the desired closeness, the two persons involved in a relationship should be aware of each other’s family backgrounds. It can be quite important to know your partner’s personality and the environment in which he/she became an adult. It is also essential to be aware of each other’s feelings and thoughts. Making future plans together is a great way to strengthen the connection between you and your partner, and to prepare you to face all problems together as a strong and healthy couple.

Last but not least, it is significant for those who are looking to have intimacy in their relationship to always encourage and praise their partners. It is equally important to compliment each other and to show your appreciation towards your partner in any possible way and occasion. Being intimate with each other and becoming familiar with your partner is all about sharing your inner personality.

The failure to establish and maintain intimacy in a relationship will ultimately lead to coldness and indifference, that will eventually destroy the connection between you and your partner. In a relationship it is absolutely crucial to have intimacy, it is one of the key elements for the passion that will keep the relationship alive for a very long time.

Photo: karpov the wrecked train

You might be surprised, but it’s not your appearance, your wealth, your great job or your fortune that is responsible for a wonderful and everlasting relationship. The key to it lies in your way of thinking. Here are six crucial tips for creating beautiful relationships:

1. A relationship is not a contest or a race! A healthy relationship is about playing in the same team. It is pointless trying to outscore your partner. Of course, you might be the MVP - most valuable player - today or another day. However, you will be all alone, without the support of your “teammate” if you keep doing this, and you will end up racing just against you. Stop this race of yours, be a real team player and try to win the game as a member of the triumphing team!

2. Be open, learn to hear, see and interact. I really enjoy sitting down and having a relaxing chit chat with my partner. We are discussing major issues as well as minor things, sharing our thoughts and ideas when we are interacting with each other. We don’t punish each other with silence, and we are certainly not ending a day with being angry. For a strong relationship, learn to have genuine discussions with your partner.

3. Be aware that a relationship is not about owning your partner. This is most likely the most frequently encountered problem. The things that can really damage a relationship are jealousy and over-protectiveness. Get rid of these feelings - if you have them - or your relationship will not have a happy ending.

4. Paying attention to yourself should be one of your top priorities. The kind of relationship you have with yourself is a crucial one. You have to look after your appearance and your mind every single day. I am talking about self-esteem. If you fail to properly take care of you, the others will neglect you as well. Since you have already proven that you have no confidence in yourself, then who I am to challenge that? Begin with looking after yourself and through this you will have the necessary strength and energy to look after those who you care so much about.

5. Bring back the romance. Being romantic sends the following message: “You are my primary concern, I care deeply about you and your feelings and desires, and I want everything to be perfect for us”. You are also sending a message about you being confident. You might be surprised, but the appreciation that you’ll get for being romantic can be a much higher motivation and incentive than the pleasure and joy that it brings. Be an expert in romance and I can guarantee that it will add color to your life.

6. Learn to accept compromises, but not always and for everything. Relationships are based on finding the middle ground. It is alright to meet halfway every now and then, that’s how life is. Just don’t over-do it. Don’t always be the one making all the compromises as that will break you in pieces and destroy your self-esteem. Find the balance when to give and when to take, as well as when to just abandon the ship.

Photo: Frederic della Faille

Do relationships have some kind of secret that makes some of the work and others not? They might have. It seems that there are people that feel sorry for themselves, without doing anything to change that, and there are others who live their lives dealing with any problems they might encounter. They might have learned these precious secrets from their families or friends.

Here are a couple of tried and tested ideas from those who have experienced healthy and long-lasting relationships:

Remember - Sit back and remember the time when you first met each other. Especially in hard times, try to sit back and recall the old time events and situations that are reconnecting you with each other.

Rendez-vous - Although life is sometimes like a high-speed train, try to spend the evening together. It doesn’t have to be something out of the ordinary, watching a movie together or playing cards or chess will do just fine.

Have fun - Most of us tend to have fun when we are dating and start to get serious once we get married. Forget that! Browse some of the fun websites out there and try out a few online games together. Or borrow a game console along with some games - enjoy them and simply have fun!

Forgive and forget - It is useless to constantly think about all the unpleasant events that happened during a dispute. Let them off your mind then and there. Don’t be shy and be the first to forgive and forget!

Distance - Keep a certain distance between each other. Everyone needs some space and time to spend alone or with friends. Every now and then we need some distance from our partner, make sure that both of you enjoy the same amount of personal freedom.

Argue - There is nothing wrong with disagreeing on certain things. However it is useless to get into flaming discussions. It is just not necessary to agree on everything. Don’t worry, there is absolutely nothing wrong with that.

Things to remember - Enjoy some quality time together, it doesn’t have to be something really sophisticated. You might for example have enjoyed the fireworks the other day. A year later you might want to plan to watch it again.

You can turn this into a habit. Gather articles and photos about fireworks, buy a couple of firecrackers on your own, read about the history of fireworks - who knows, it might turn into a passion.

As a conclusion don’t just simply sit there and feel sorry for yourself. Little things can build a better relationship and the big problems might not seem that big at all. To build a better relationship you have to be aware of what needs to be done and especially how. There is no need to reinvent the wheel, simply implement some of these tried and tested ideas to have a better relationship.